Do Not Lose to Your Child’s Whining
Oleh: Morinaga Platinum
Almost every parent has experienced a child’s whining. You surely agree that it is a bad habit. This habit generally happens during the fourth year of your children’s life. However, if this habit left untreated, this habit can continue up to the school age.
In the beginning, whining is a form of communication to get parent’s attention because your children do not have a fully developed skill of communication. No wonder, children’s whining will usually get worse if parents ignore it.
At the age of 1-2 years old, your children whine to get your attention. They whine because they have a limited ability to communicate. But, as they grow up, they realize that whining is a good way to get the thing they want. This method is usually effective for them to get what they want, don’t you agree? This is the thing that we need to avoid, when your children use whining as a weapon and use it against parent’s will.
Is there any effective way to stop children’s whining? Parents can apply these tips by Michele Borba, Ed.D, the author of The Big Book of Parenting Solutions.
Do not tolerate any whining
The best way to stop this habit is by not listening to your children’s wish, unless they say it in a good tone. Tell your children to say what they want in a polite manner. You can ignore them for a while, until they change the way they talk and stop whining. Once your children stop whining, you can start listening to their wish. Children’s whining will usually resolve once they realize that their wish will not be granted unless your terms is obeyed. So, just be consistent in applying these tips.
Give an example of the right talking manner
When you are spending some leisure time together with your children, try to communicate in a good manner and teach them how to ask politely. Give them the example of whining and a polite request. Ask them to practice a polite way to request.
Appreciate your children’s effort
Changing a habit is not easy, whining is one of them. So, make sure you appreciate their effort, no matter how small it is. You can give some compliment by saying, “That’s better, next time use this nice tone when asking for something.”
Give some consequences to deal with your child’s whining
If the first point has been executed but failed to control your child’s whining, then it is time to give some consequences. You can give this consequence directly, right when your child whining. When your child whining during a car drive, you can pull over and tell him that you will not continue the journey, unless your child stop whining. Consequence must be upheld, whenever and wherever a violation is done.
Spent some quality time with your children. You can ask them to play or read some books. During this quality time, you can tell your children what are the things that are allowed and the things that are prohibited. Your children will also understand what you want easier during this quality time. This activity will also tighten the relationship between parents and children.